the muse (23)






The only salvation
For your atrocity
- of not posting in two days -
Is your referral,
- Most poigant -
To another comic genius.





When I transfer
The server
New shit will come to light.











Amy woke with a start. Immediately her hand went to her belly, reassuring herself that her babies were safe.
As always, when she was sleeping alone she was vigilant, and a bit nervous. She collected herself for a
minute, analyzing the last minute. A car had pulled up outside, slamming into something, causing a racket.
The garbage can. She raised herself on one elbow, checked the clock that sat on the cluttered nightstand.
1:15 am. Mark wasn't supposed to be home till the afternoon. She panicked, and was out of bed in a flash.
She grabbed the mag lite from the floor, the glock from the drawer -- checked the chamber -- grabbed a leather
jacket from behind the door and threw it over the wife-beater she was wearing. Her heart pounded in her
throat. Her gut told her something was very wrong.
As she passed the window she saw headlights of a car shining in, and she could see in their glimmer liquid
spraying in the air. The car was facing the house, half ways up on the curb, high beams shining askew. It was
Mark's car.
She rushed outside.
***
As she dashed across the lawn she heard the phone ringing inside, the emergency line. She ignored it.
Smoke was coming from the hood of the squad car, and bullet holes and score marks lined the side and hood of
the car. Half the front windshield was spidered, half was missing. She could she Mark inside, his head
lolling to one side.
She stifled a scream, and pulled at the passenger door. The handle came off in her hands, and, losing
control, she tore the rest of the door off the car and dove inside.
Mark's hair was matted with blood, his badge was missing. He was wearing his seat belt, but it, too, was
covered in blood.
She gently held his head; brushed the blood out of his face with the palm of her hand. His eyes flicked open
and shut. She carefully undid his seat belt, and pulled open his jacket. She gasped. She saw burn marks,
bullet wounds, and blood. Bits of bone protruded from his chest. His shirt was wet with blood. His body began
to quiver, and his arm moved, jerkily.
As the tears streamed down her face, she held him close. His body shook again and then was still.
***
"It's okay," she whispered, between sobs. "I'm here, Mark. I love you."
"We're here," she sobbed again, indicating her swollen belly. "We love you."
***
She was still holding him when the screaming of the sirens ceased, and turned into doors opening and
slamming.
"Mark was pronounced dead at the scene," she heard some say. "They shot him eight times..."
"He was doing his duty, he died in the line of service..."
"Mrs. T, come this way, please."
She looked helplessly, dumbly, at the hands moving toward her.
She kissed his forehead, and surrendered to the darkness.
***


July 15, 2005, 1.48 am
Oh sleep! It is a gentle thing,
Beloved from pole to pole!
To Mary Queen the praise be given!
She sent the gentle sleep from Heaven,
That slid into my soul.
Beloved from pole to pole!
To Mary Queen the praise be given!
She sent the gentle sleep from Heaven,
That slid into my soul.
- Rime of the Ancient Mariner, Samuel Taylor Coleridge
categorized as the muse

June 7, 2005, 7.42 pm
Old age is golden, or so I’ve heard said,
But sometimes I wonder, as I crawl into bed,
With my ears in a drawer, my teeth in a cup,
My eyes on the table until I wake up.
As sleep dims my vision, I say to myself:
Is there anything else I should lay on the shelf?
But, though nations are warring, and Congress is vexed,
We’ll still stick around to see what happens next!
How do I know my youth is all spent?
My get-up-and-go has got up and went!
But, in spite of it all, I’m able to grin
And think of the places my getup has been!
When I was young, my slippers were red;
I could kick up my heels right over my head.
When I was older my slippers were blue,
But still I could dance the whole night through.
Now I am older, my slippers are black.
I huff to the store and puff my way back.
But never you laugh; I don’t mind at all:
I’d rather be huffing than not puff at all!
How do I know my youth is all spent?
My get-up-and-go has got up and went!
But, in spite of it all, I’m able to grin
And think of the places my getup has been!
I get up each morning and dust off my wits,
Open the paper, and read the Obits.
If I’m not there, I know I’m not dead,
So I eat a good breakfast and go back to bed!
How do I know my youth is all spent?
My get-up-and-go has got up and went!
But, in spite of it all, I’m able to grin
And think of the places my getup has been!
But sometimes I wonder, as I crawl into bed,
With my ears in a drawer, my teeth in a cup,
My eyes on the table until I wake up.
As sleep dims my vision, I say to myself:
Is there anything else I should lay on the shelf?
But, though nations are warring, and Congress is vexed,
We’ll still stick around to see what happens next!
How do I know my youth is all spent?
My get-up-and-go has got up and went!
But, in spite of it all, I’m able to grin
And think of the places my getup has been!
When I was young, my slippers were red;
I could kick up my heels right over my head.
When I was older my slippers were blue,
But still I could dance the whole night through.
Now I am older, my slippers are black.
I huff to the store and puff my way back.
But never you laugh; I don’t mind at all:
I’d rather be huffing than not puff at all!
How do I know my youth is all spent?
My get-up-and-go has got up and went!
But, in spite of it all, I’m able to grin
And think of the places my getup has been!
I get up each morning and dust off my wits,
Open the paper, and read the Obits.
If I’m not there, I know I’m not dead,
So I eat a good breakfast and go back to bed!
How do I know my youth is all spent?
My get-up-and-go has got up and went!
But, in spite of it all, I’m able to grin
And think of the places my getup has been!
- Anonymous
I found it here.
But what about this:
Some sweet talkin' mama with a face like a gent
Said my get up and go must a got up and went
From here. Is that a rip by Aerosmith from Pete Seeger? Hmm...
I found it here.
But what about this:
Some sweet talkin' mama with a face like a gent
Said my get up and go must a got up and went
From here. Is that a rip by Aerosmith from Pete Seeger? Hmm...
categorized as the muse

April 21, 2005, 6.46 pm
"Of course, I love you," the flower said to him. "If you were not aware of it, it was my fault. That is not important. But you have been just as foolish. Try to be happy..."
...
"I shall have to put up with a few caterpillars if I want to see butterflies. I understand they are very beautiful."
...
"I shall have to put up with a few caterpillars if I want to see butterflies. I understand they are very beautiful."
- Antoine de Saint-Exupery, The Little Prince
categorized as the muse

April 19, 2005, 4.31 pm
How say you? Let us, O my dove,
Let us be unashamed of soul,
As earth lies bare to heaven above!
How is it under our control
To love or not to love?
Let us be unashamed of soul,
As earth lies bare to heaven above!
How is it under our control
To love or not to love?
- Robert Browning, Two in the Campagna
categorized as the muse

March 30, 2005, 7.14 am
I wonder if
I'll still be here
When they come to work
I'll still be here
When they come to work
categorized as the muse

March 30, 2005, 7.14 am
Sometimes other people remember
The dreams that you forgot
But it's always up to you
To pull an all-nighter
Just to remember how good that dreaming is
The dreams that you forgot
But it's always up to you
To pull an all-nighter
Just to remember how good that dreaming is
categorized as the muse

March 7, 2005, 12.09 am
The only salvation
For your atrocity
- of not posting in two days -
Is your referral,
- Most poigant -
To another comic genius.
That is all.
categorized as the muse

March 3, 2005, 11.44 pm
Whence the darker times
Of earlier ages past
A Post, a Post
Shown forth from Blogdom
And in a flash, departed thence.
Of earlier ages past
A Post, a Post
Shown forth from Blogdom
And in a flash, departed thence.
I wrote a good post, and tried to post it, but it was lost to the digital void, and, like a murky dream, now lingers in semi-existence without my remembrance.
categorized as the muse

February 15, 2005, 1.02 am
Spat #3
Sin and Greed and Technology
Spin with Nicotine
(I'm a big fan of Angry Sticks
And Drunken Irish Brawling)
But Birkenstocks
and glowing computer screens
Hog my attention at midnight
(And the problem with the Pogues
Wasn't that they kicked out Shane)
Because all a man tries to do
Is create something beautiful
With his life before he dies
And some of us can do it in c.
Spin with Nicotine
(I'm a big fan of Angry Sticks
And Drunken Irish Brawling)
But Birkenstocks
and glowing computer screens
Hog my attention at midnight
(And the problem with the Pogues
Wasn't that they kicked out Shane)
Because all a man tries to do
Is create something beautiful
With his life before he dies
And some of us can do it in c.
categorized as the muse

February 15, 2005, 12.52 am
Spat #2
And is instant messenger
Only useful
For remembering the names
Of old girlfriends and lovers
As they sign on and off
In some digital void?
Only useful
For remembering the names
Of old girlfriends and lovers
As they sign on and off
In some digital void?
It's all his fault.
categorized as the muse

February 15, 2005, 12.50 am
This post has, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, inspired a stream of what I now call S.P.A.T.'s. I will hereby present them to y'all simply for the mocking streams of derision that will not doubt ensue. So there.
Spat #1
Beep and clicks
in the 'music'
that I enjoy
Is it because I am being
assimilated
into nefarious schemes of world domination?
And do we care?
in the 'music'
that I enjoy
Is it because I am being
assimilated
into nefarious schemes of world domination?
And do we care?
categorized as the muse

February 3, 2005, 2.11 pm
Right back atcha
When I transfer
The server
New shit will come to light.
categorized as the muse

January 21, 2005, 5.33 pm
Proud Refrain
What are you dreaming, soldier,
What is it you see?
A tall gray Gothic tower,
And a linden tree.
You speak so sadly, soldier,
Sad and wistfully . . .
I cannot hear the tower bell
In the swirling sea.
What meaning has it, soldier,
A tower, bell, and tree?
Nothing, nothing - only once
It meant my life to me.
What is it you see?
A tall gray Gothic tower,
And a linden tree.
You speak so sadly, soldier,
Sad and wistfully . . .
I cannot hear the tower bell
In the swirling sea.
What meaning has it, soldier,
A tower, bell, and tree?
Nothing, nothing - only once
It meant my life to me.
-- Fr. Thomas Heath, OP
categorized as the muse

January 2, 2005, 6.00 am
Um. I've been writing quite a bit, and not sharing it with y'all ( <-- a one-syllable word).
I call this one Fireside Memories. I wrote it about an hour ago. I have a bunch more, but I'm going to bed.
I call this one Fireside Memories. I wrote it about an hour ago. I have a bunch more, but I'm going to bed.
Stories of things that happened
Overshadowed by things that haven't happened
- Yet are sure to -
Sure to, and forseen, and have been forseen
On nights such as this, when drunk off fumes
And fireside memories and reminiscing until late hours,
When the candles have tipped over and have spilt their hot wax
Which has hardened into a splurb of cotton-colored, mantel-topping volcanic flow
That's when you cross my mind again, and I remember the dreams that I had last night -
Whiskey dreams - with bright colors, and free movements, and the beautiful girl that I love
Who is no longer by my side.
Overshadowed by things that haven't happened
- Yet are sure to -
Sure to, and forseen, and have been forseen
On nights such as this, when drunk off fumes
And fireside memories and reminiscing until late hours,
When the candles have tipped over and have spilt their hot wax
Which has hardened into a splurb of cotton-colored, mantel-topping volcanic flow
That's when you cross my mind again, and I remember the dreams that I had last night -
Whiskey dreams - with bright colors, and free movements, and the beautiful girl that I love
Who is no longer by my side.
categorized as the muse

January 2, 2005, 5.37 am
Bloodshot eyes and a nosebleed
A punctured eardrum lets in Dave Matthews
Better than I thought it should be
I need sleep
A punctured eardrum lets in Dave Matthews
Better than I thought it should be
I need sleep
categorized as the muse

January 1, 2005, 7.13 pm
I remember whiskey
A flask in the back of a cab
San Francisco in the rain
And a calzone from the corner-store
Two-fifty and microwaved hot
Peel the plastic - orange, now off and
Scarf, Robin wants a bite.
The car angles into the parking space nose-diving into the curb and nearly nosing the white car ahead
A loaf of bread
And Skippy peanut butter
Three sandwiches back to back, scraping the brown off the folding knife with a soft, brown crust
A few more hours until the tow comes
A few more flask-fulls, a few more Koreans -
Not knowing what we are doing outside their flat.
We don't really, either, just that
This car does not go up hills, any longer
Just down.
A flask in the back of a cab
San Francisco in the rain
And a calzone from the corner-store
Two-fifty and microwaved hot
Peel the plastic - orange, now off and
Scarf, Robin wants a bite.
The car angles into the parking space nose-diving into the curb and nearly nosing the white car ahead
A loaf of bread
And Skippy peanut butter
Three sandwiches back to back, scraping the brown off the folding knife with a soft, brown crust
A few more hours until the tow comes
A few more flask-fulls, a few more Koreans -
Not knowing what we are doing outside their flat.
We don't really, either, just that
This car does not go up hills, any longer
Just down.
categorized as the muse

January 1, 2005, 7.13 pm
I remember whiskey
A flask in the back of a cab
San Francisco in the rain
And a calzone from the corner-store
Two-fifty and microwaved hot
Peel the plastic - orange, now off and
Scarf, Robin wants a bite.
The car angles into the parking space nose-diving into the curb and nearly nosing the white car ahead
A loaf of bread
And Skippy peanut butter
Three sandwiches back to back, scraping the brown off the folding knife with a soft, brown crust
A few more hours until the tow comes
A few more flask-fulls, a few more Koreans -
Not knowing what we are doing outside their flat.
We don't really, either, just that
This car does not go up hills, any longer
Just down.
A flask in the back of a cab
San Francisco in the rain
And a calzone from the corner-store
Two-fifty and microwaved hot
Peel the plastic - orange, now off and
Scarf, Robin wants a bite.
The car angles into the parking space nose-diving into the curb and nearly nosing the white car ahead
A loaf of bread
And Skippy peanut butter
Three sandwiches back to back, scraping the brown off the folding knife with a soft, brown crust
A few more hours until the tow comes
A few more flask-fulls, a few more Koreans -
Not knowing what we are doing outside their flat.
We don't really, either, just that
This car does not go up hills, any longer
Just down.
categorized as the muse

December 21, 2004, 6.21 pm
And then one day we grew old.
The trousers, torn and soiled -
Skin, like bad milk, smelling and spoiled.
The day yawns, once triumphant and bold.
A weariness creases the book's spine;
The future ceases to consume the mind.
We are no longer content to be cold.
No longer life on top of the pile,
Innocence, painlessness are gone from the smile.
And another sheep enters the fold.
The trousers, torn and soiled -
Skin, like bad milk, smelling and spoiled.
The day yawns, once triumphant and bold.
A weariness creases the book's spine;
The future ceases to consume the mind.
We are no longer content to be cold.
No longer life on top of the pile,
Innocence, painlessness are gone from the smile.
And another sheep enters the fold.
categorized as the muse

November 26, 2004, 10.09 am
I think of you so much. I think of us, and all the funny, nice things we've done, and all the nicer things we're going to do. I think of nice places and people, and, when I think of them, you're always there, always tall and death-mouthed and big-eyed and no-voiced, with a collegiate ribbon or a phallic hat. I think of us in pubs and clubs and cinemas and beds. I think I love you.
- Dylan Thomas, January 28 & 29, 1937
Cwmdonkin Drive, Uplands, Swansea
...from a letter to Emily Holmes...
Cwmdonkin Drive, Uplands, Swansea
...from a letter to Emily Holmes...
categorized as the muse

August 17, 2004, 3.28 pm
Six pictures of the mystical mountain
Grace the pillars of my wall
Grace the pillars of my wall
categorized as the muse

August 15, 2004, 6.13 am
The sky is lightening --
The cowboy singing to himself,
A woman cries, a lover dies;
The dude abides.
The cowboy singing to himself,
A woman cries, a lover dies;
The dude abides.
categorized as the muse

August 14, 2004, 10.20 pm
I'm living in heaven / I'm floating in a fairy tale.
categorized as the muse

August 8, 2004, 12.42 am
Mark and Amy
Amy woke with a start. Immediately her hand went to her belly, reassuring herself that her babies were safe.
As always, when she was sleeping alone she was vigilant, and a bit nervous. She collected herself for a
minute, analyzing the last minute. A car had pulled up outside, slamming into something, causing a racket.
The garbage can. She raised herself on one elbow, checked the clock that sat on the cluttered nightstand.
1:15 am. Mark wasn't supposed to be home till the afternoon. She panicked, and was out of bed in a flash.
She grabbed the mag lite from the floor, the glock from the drawer -- checked the chamber -- grabbed a leather
jacket from behind the door and threw it over the wife-beater she was wearing. Her heart pounded in her
throat. Her gut told her something was very wrong.
As she passed the window she saw headlights of a car shining in, and she could see in their glimmer liquid
spraying in the air. The car was facing the house, half ways up on the curb, high beams shining askew. It was
Mark's car.
She rushed outside.
***
As she dashed across the lawn she heard the phone ringing inside, the emergency line. She ignored it.
Smoke was coming from the hood of the squad car, and bullet holes and score marks lined the side and hood of
the car. Half the front windshield was spidered, half was missing. She could she Mark inside, his head
lolling to one side.
She stifled a scream, and pulled at the passenger door. The handle came off in her hands, and, losing
control, she tore the rest of the door off the car and dove inside.
Mark's hair was matted with blood, his badge was missing. He was wearing his seat belt, but it, too, was
covered in blood.
She gently held his head; brushed the blood out of his face with the palm of her hand. His eyes flicked open
and shut. She carefully undid his seat belt, and pulled open his jacket. She gasped. She saw burn marks,
bullet wounds, and blood. Bits of bone protruded from his chest. His shirt was wet with blood. His body began
to quiver, and his arm moved, jerkily.
As the tears streamed down her face, she held him close. His body shook again and then was still.
***
"It's okay," she whispered, between sobs. "I'm here, Mark. I love you."
"We're here," she sobbed again, indicating her swollen belly. "We love you."
***
She was still holding him when the screaming of the sirens ceased, and turned into doors opening and
slamming.
"Mark was pronounced dead at the scene," she heard some say. "They shot him eight times..."
"He was doing his duty, he died in the line of service..."
"Mrs. T, come this way, please."
She looked helplessly, dumbly, at the hands moving toward her.
She kissed his forehead, and surrendered to the darkness.
***
categorized as the muse

















Commentary:
sartracker(at symbol removed)gmail.com
http://tracesoftime.blogspot.com
Well, wherever it came from I like it. I hope to keep huffing and puffing for a long while longer. And the big font is great, I can almost see it without my glasses. Heehee! Kitty
Kitty Mason
The first time I heard it was on this Pete Seeger cd... YOU can listen to it here...
Dz